dismantle this morning

I'm content for now, to spend all day in my room. I used to get restless when I wasn't doing something, when I had no activity to give my day a sense of purpose. Here I feel like I've earned some time off. I get to be at Ringling and not have to do a goddamn thing. I'm looking forward to school starting but I'm not counting the days. I'm not really finding myself in great need of looking forward any more than I have to. I don't often look backwards either, if I can help it. I've never been one to be sentimental. The best you'll get from me is a slight wave of nostalgia. I'll tell you a story if you ask me, but I won't long for those days back, nor will I regret that they happened. I just wonder when I can look back at this age, at my 20 year old self, and what I will think of her then.
I've made smart moves and dumb moves in the past two weeks or so. I'm kind of glad though, to once again be in situations that require tactfulness.

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