"But I do wonder if a down-easter, sitting on a nylon-and-aluminum chair out on a changelessly green lawn slapping mosquitoes in the evening of a Florida October-- I do wonder if the stab of memory doesn't strike him high in the stomach just below the ribs where it hurts. And in the humid ever-summer I dare his picturing mind not to go back to the shout of color, to the clean rasp of frosty air, to the smell of pine wood burning and the caressing warmth of kitchens. For how can one know color in perpetual green, and what good is warmth without cold to give it sweetness?"
Tumultuous times!
Not the best scan?
Cousins looking angry
Girls can draw pirates too
A few new things.
Precollege is done, but the next two weeks will not give me much reprieve. Pennsylvania then camping in Virginia. Lots to think about.
I also managed to get a children's book job- the story is about a pudgy, awkward bunny who does strange things in a zoo. Sounds like something I shouldn't have much trouble with.
Til next time
Peaches
Finished my spring sketchbook, moving on to the watercolor one. I plan on making a new sketchbook that I can keep at the same time to do pencil/pen/dry media stuff. Doesn't look the same on the watercolor paper.
Various Precollege associated people
Awkward girls in their underwear
Dangers of owning an iPod
Horse Drawin'
Portrait night, with Precollege kids. These were each about 5-10 (about 20 for the bottom ones). I work much better when I work fast and don't overwork stuff
More portrait night
and more portrait night. The kid on the right is from NPR, and doesn't always look so demonic
It is hard to think of anything concise I could possibly say about Precollege. I expected to work hard, and I expected long hours and everything else. I expected to have fun with friends who were also working. But, I didn't expect that the experience would change me this much.
I feel like the past few weeks have been a time of unexpected, strangely drastic growth. Not that I am older and wiser now, but that I'm more aware of certain things. Seeing people who are where you just used to be (high school) is a pretty eye opening experience. It makes you aware of how much you've come, and also how much you still have to go to be anything close to how you want to be.
That, and I have felt a great change from being in situations that are just outside your comfort zone. I don't think I ever want such a mind numbing comfort zone again. I feel a lot more inspired and honest when put in new situations with new people, with new things to learn and think about. I think the way I am now is how I've wanted to be for a while. To be able to be seen as more than just my first impression (librarian, nerdy, snobby, freckly.). To finally loosen up, live a more raw and immediate existence. Will this all change when I come back for school for real, for junior year? Is this kind of life only specific to these 4 weeks? I don't know, but I really hope I can maintain this. Maintain friendships, work ethic, everything else. I feel like things are starting to change, and even if I'm not sure how, I feel strangely ready for whatever happens.
Various Precollege associated people
Awkward girls in their underwear
Dangers of owning an iPod
Horse Drawin'
Portrait night, with Precollege kids. These were each about 5-10 (about 20 for the bottom ones). I work much better when I work fast and don't overwork stuff
More portrait night
and more portrait night. The kid on the right is from NPR, and doesn't always look so demonic
It is hard to think of anything concise I could possibly say about Precollege. I expected to work hard, and I expected long hours and everything else. I expected to have fun with friends who were also working. But, I didn't expect that the experience would change me this much.
I feel like the past few weeks have been a time of unexpected, strangely drastic growth. Not that I am older and wiser now, but that I'm more aware of certain things. Seeing people who are where you just used to be (high school) is a pretty eye opening experience. It makes you aware of how much you've come, and also how much you still have to go to be anything close to how you want to be.
That, and I have felt a great change from being in situations that are just outside your comfort zone. I don't think I ever want such a mind numbing comfort zone again. I feel a lot more inspired and honest when put in new situations with new people, with new things to learn and think about. I think the way I am now is how I've wanted to be for a while. To be able to be seen as more than just my first impression (librarian, nerdy, snobby, freckly.). To finally loosen up, live a more raw and immediate existence. Will this all change when I come back for school for real, for junior year? Is this kind of life only specific to these 4 weeks? I don't know, but I really hope I can maintain this. Maintain friendships, work ethic, everything else. I feel like things are starting to change, and even if I'm not sure how, I feel strangely ready for whatever happens.
Cauliflower
Just bought a new watercolor sketchbook. Hopefully it will force me to become much more direct with my watercolors. Less overworking, just straight honest brushwork.
Some other various sketches.
Precollege has been a very interesting experience. The days are passing far more quickly than I had anticipated. I'm halfway done with all of my teaching responsibilities, which is a bit of a shock. In many ways I hope the last 2 weeks don't fly by. I really enjoy our situation as a TA. Nights off to draw or go out, and the work we do have is all academic based. All of the living issues, the RAs have to take care of. Part of me is almost kind of apprehensive about starting next school year, we have way more responsibility and pressure to get better.
But I feel like I'm becoming obsessed with drawing and illustration again. I had never really gotten away from it, but now I feel like I've come back to it with a new kind of enthusiasm. I hope we keep it up.
In an unrelated note, I like this article
For breakfast, we grind
A building in tallahassee that I drew whilst waiting for my sister's concert
"Moon Drawing" the first precollege event that the kids got to go to, where they had to draw each other in almost complete darkness. It proved to be a challenge for us too, but it was fun to draw such a huge group of people
I am incredibly happy to be back here. It is great to go from having to force myself to pick up a pen and draw, to being in an environment where drawing feels like breathing, something I have to be doing instead of sitting still. I think I am addicted to certain kinds of work, work that I enjoy. And thusfar, I have really enjoyed being a precollege TA. I like the students, the classes, getting to see friends a lot, I like the long hours, the feeling of not getting quite enough sleep. Somehow it feels like my time is more worthwhile, more meaningful and raw than just time wasted at home. The past week has been very good for me, I hope the next 3 weeks don't fly by too quickly.
I think even as students here, we take Ringling for granted. It's great to see a group of kids who are grateful for an environment that supports what they love to do. Even if they're unsure of themselves or haven't quite figured things out yet, it is still nice to see them appreciate being here. I think we kind of forget what it's like to desperately want to be a student here. Maybe not, maybe we do keep it in the front of our minds. I hope so, really.
Palimpsest
Tomorrow I move in for Precollege. It snuck up quite quickly, as many things do, just after I had found a kind of peace here. Precollege, like most Ringling events, does not seem too well organized at this point, being as I don't know where I'm living, if I'm living in an apartment or what. I'm trying to not freak out, but we McGuires, we like to know in advance, to put our minds at ease.
Also, I think everyone college aged should read this article, and think about a time when your parents couldn't reach you 5 times a day, when you were young and on your own and ran your own life. I love my mom, I love her more for not being one of those parents who fights my battles for me-
Mommy, Tell my Professor he's not nice!
I am not taking my computer to school, not that this is updated regularly, nor viewed by more than 4 people, but nonetheless, updates will be sporadic. I'm really looking forward to getting to work at precollege. I know I have a great interest in teaching in the future, and I hope this gives me an indication of if I gots what it takes. Or... if a bunch of high schoolers are better artists than I am.
Also, I think everyone college aged should read this article, and think about a time when your parents couldn't reach you 5 times a day, when you were young and on your own and ran your own life. I love my mom, I love her more for not being one of those parents who fights my battles for me-
Mommy, Tell my Professor he's not nice!
I am not taking my computer to school, not that this is updated regularly, nor viewed by more than 4 people, but nonetheless, updates will be sporadic. I'm really looking forward to getting to work at precollege. I know I have a great interest in teaching in the future, and I hope this gives me an indication of if I gots what it takes. Or... if a bunch of high schoolers are better artists than I am.
Strange Changes in Imagery
I don't know what happens to my aesthetic when I'm away from school. It's like I forget there is a whole world of art out there. Being away from influence can be a good thing, but it also means being away from inspiration. Imagery gets tired and trite, and I find myself forgetting all sorts of things that used to be taken for granted. I start forgetting that I used to find more things to be beautiful. I miss my library.
Nonetheless, if not to make something that looks good, than to at least make something... I've still been trying to keep up in my sketchbook. Mostly I'm either thinking really hard about what I'm going to draw before I draw it, or I'm not thinking enough, and things end up looking screwy or overworked.
drawn mostly from photos in the paper after the Haditha story (scandal?) broke.
I leave in a week for Precollege. In the meantime, I've been reading a lot. That is always the best part of being home for summer, finally having the time to read. I finished White Teeth by Zadie Smith, which was alright, maybe a bit overhyped. I'm reading You Shall Know Our Velocity! by Dave Eggers, a slight disappointment in comparison to the Heartbreaking blahblahblah. Strangely, both of them are good writers, I just feel the fluff in both of their writing styles. They have nice passages, beautifully written, but too often, they weigh themselves down.
Up next to read are The Devil Wears Prada since the movie's coming out, and I'd like a short, fast, kind of nothing read, and then Adverbs, by Daniel Handler (better known as Lemony Snickets). Adverbs is not written for kids though. I've read the first two chapters, as far as I can tell, it's a series of short stories, all centered around different kinds of love, each chapter is described as a different adverb (Obviously, Immediately, etc). I am trying to save it and enjoy it a little bit at a time.
I hope I can keep reading and finding things to read when school is back in session. It's important to not let art completely take over, and to have a healthy amount of my other interests to keep me sane.
Nonetheless, if not to make something that looks good, than to at least make something... I've still been trying to keep up in my sketchbook. Mostly I'm either thinking really hard about what I'm going to draw before I draw it, or I'm not thinking enough, and things end up looking screwy or overworked.
drawn mostly from photos in the paper after the Haditha story (scandal?) broke.
I leave in a week for Precollege. In the meantime, I've been reading a lot. That is always the best part of being home for summer, finally having the time to read. I finished White Teeth by Zadie Smith, which was alright, maybe a bit overhyped. I'm reading You Shall Know Our Velocity! by Dave Eggers, a slight disappointment in comparison to the Heartbreaking blahblahblah. Strangely, both of them are good writers, I just feel the fluff in both of their writing styles. They have nice passages, beautifully written, but too often, they weigh themselves down.
Up next to read are The Devil Wears Prada since the movie's coming out, and I'd like a short, fast, kind of nothing read, and then Adverbs, by Daniel Handler (better known as Lemony Snickets). Adverbs is not written for kids though. I've read the first two chapters, as far as I can tell, it's a series of short stories, all centered around different kinds of love, each chapter is described as a different adverb (Obviously, Immediately, etc). I am trying to save it and enjoy it a little bit at a time.
I hope I can keep reading and finding things to read when school is back in session. It's important to not let art completely take over, and to have a healthy amount of my other interests to keep me sane.
I Am Not a Graphic Designer
Well, I'm not a graphic designer, but when I come home, I always seemed to get roped into doing graphic design for people. T-shirts, posters, concert programs, just miscellaneous things. All of it gives me a greater appreciation for people who actually know what they're doing when it comes to layouts, typography, logos and the like, since it is always a bit difficult for me. But I get paid (usuaully) so I can't complain. Here's recent stuff
>Shirt for local music camp that runs during the summer. This is the 3rd camp shirt I've done, not to mention an extra 6 or so shirts for other school band camps. My designs are predictable
>My sister's senior clarinet recital is this weekend, and I agreed to make her a poster. She wanted something that looked like a page of an Urban Outfitters catalog, that whole distressed vintage like look. This was actually pretty fun, I wish my graphics (the clarinet, the pattern in the back) had been higher resolution, but it got the job done.
Having your wisdom teeth out is not fun. I miss chewing real food, and sleeping through a whole night. Lately I've been waking up between 4 and 6 AM with some splitting pains in my jaw. But I think the worst is over, so it's just a matter of patience now. I have puffy cheeks and small grass green bruises, making me look like a face out of a Jenny Saville painting.
Summer has been a bit frustrating, but a lot of stuff is coming up soon. I'm working at the music camp I did that shirt for, then working 4 weeks at Ringling, and then going to Pennsylvania to see Jamie. Hopefully it will motivate me to do everything I had planned to do. One thing at a time.
-Erin
>Shirt for local music camp that runs during the summer. This is the 3rd camp shirt I've done, not to mention an extra 6 or so shirts for other school band camps. My designs are predictable
>My sister's senior clarinet recital is this weekend, and I agreed to make her a poster. She wanted something that looked like a page of an Urban Outfitters catalog, that whole distressed vintage like look. This was actually pretty fun, I wish my graphics (the clarinet, the pattern in the back) had been higher resolution, but it got the job done.
Having your wisdom teeth out is not fun. I miss chewing real food, and sleeping through a whole night. Lately I've been waking up between 4 and 6 AM with some splitting pains in my jaw. But I think the worst is over, so it's just a matter of patience now. I have puffy cheeks and small grass green bruises, making me look like a face out of a Jenny Saville painting.
Summer has been a bit frustrating, but a lot of stuff is coming up soon. I'm working at the music camp I did that shirt for, then working 4 weeks at Ringling, and then going to Pennsylvania to see Jamie. Hopefully it will motivate me to do everything I had planned to do. One thing at a time.
-Erin
GEORGIA
> A few random sketches, the bottom being the view off the back deck at my aunt's house.
Georgia was a definite change of pace, attitude, and scenery. It's a bit ironic, that when you live in Florida, you have to head North before you really feel like you're in the south (the ten commandments, posted at every mailbox), but nonetheless, I think it was a good vacation. I met a lot of real characters up in Georgia, from the 11 year-old who volunteered to help my mom and I pseudo-bartend the party for my aunt's studio, to the guy who makes pumpkin pie fudge, to the woman my cousins called "Crazy Cathy," who lives by herself in a 6000 sqare foot house (painted purple, no less), complete with two kitchens, 5 bathrooms, and an elevator. And while the repetition of quaint country stores got old really fast, it was something different, something not Florida.
> My aunt, sitting on rocks by the waterfall. Still needs some work, this was a quick attempt to get things down before we ventured back
On our first full day there, my aunt, cousin, mom, and I took a 5 mile hike that showed off a few of the many waterfalls around there.
> Waterfall at Raven Cliff, I had to go to great lengths to take this picture, going down a pretty steep 20 foot cliffside. My mom and aunt wisely just stayed on the trail
It was nice to see hills, mountains, tall tall trees and get a better sense of nature, even if the bugs drove me crazy. Last night I had to kill a pretty big centipede before getting to bed. So, as nice and relaxing as the country can be, I'd be happiest in a place where the bugs aren't constantly after me.
And finally, to give me a break from my break (it's frusrating when vacations stop being fun) Kyler drove over from Atlanta so we could chat and get some food. I miss having such good friends around.
Tomorrow I get my wisdom teeth out, and then I'll be kind of out of it for a few days. I plan on watching LOST and enjoying a pain-killer induced bliss.
SKETCHBOOK
Time for a real post I suppose?
Here are some recent sketchbook pages.
From my 2nd semester figure journal.
Same. I do not have much patience with pencil, unfortunately.
I drew this page my first week home from school, the only thing to do was watch WWII documentaries
Being in Port Richey has a strange effect on my aesthetic. I feel like at Ringling, anything goes. Weird is the norm, almost. But when I come home, everything becomes kind of bland. Drawing is less of an impulse, and more of a conscious choice, that I have to sit down with the intent of drawing something specific. It's a shame that Ringling's school year is packed into a very fast 8 months, 8 months of intense work that leaves little time to really utilize everything else that there is on campus. FEWS, the library, personal projects, all have to take the backseat to class work.
And then, an excessively long summer to go to the other extreme. Plenty of time to do all those things you wanted to do, but no more models, no wonderful library, and the worst- very little motivation. I'm really glad I'm working at Precollege this summer. I know it will be closer to the balance I'd hoped for- Ringling's atmosphere and resources, with time to actually use them. We'll see.
I'm going to Georgia this weekend, my aunt owns a store/gallery up there, as well as a house that is apparently up in the mountains. I'll be packing my easel and paints, and hopefully I'll knuckle down and get some landscape paintings done. Because really now, how often are we given the opportunity to paint anything even remotely close to a mountain in Florida?
Here are some recent sketchbook pages.
From my 2nd semester figure journal.
Same. I do not have much patience with pencil, unfortunately.
I drew this page my first week home from school, the only thing to do was watch WWII documentaries
Being in Port Richey has a strange effect on my aesthetic. I feel like at Ringling, anything goes. Weird is the norm, almost. But when I come home, everything becomes kind of bland. Drawing is less of an impulse, and more of a conscious choice, that I have to sit down with the intent of drawing something specific. It's a shame that Ringling's school year is packed into a very fast 8 months, 8 months of intense work that leaves little time to really utilize everything else that there is on campus. FEWS, the library, personal projects, all have to take the backseat to class work.
And then, an excessively long summer to go to the other extreme. Plenty of time to do all those things you wanted to do, but no more models, no wonderful library, and the worst- very little motivation. I'm really glad I'm working at Precollege this summer. I know it will be closer to the balance I'd hoped for- Ringling's atmosphere and resources, with time to actually use them. We'll see.
I'm going to Georgia this weekend, my aunt owns a store/gallery up there, as well as a house that is apparently up in the mountains. I'll be packing my easel and paints, and hopefully I'll knuckle down and get some landscape paintings done. Because really now, how often are we given the opportunity to paint anything even remotely close to a mountain in Florida?
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